MOVE ON -- MOVE FORWARD (special dedication for RIGIL BATISTIL)

it's so hard to imagine that even after a long time of trying to forget him/her, still you find yourself thinking and wishing more for him/her.

how hard really is it to move on and just get over things?

some people say, getting over is like dying and living again. others say it's like losing a big part of you and trying to stitch inch by inch the hole that lost part has made in your heart. others make it as letting go of the only happiness you heart can find of.

but i say the very different.

moving on is hard and difficult. i may agree to what other say: that it's like losing a big part of you, leaving a big whole in your heart and you try to stitch it, inch by inch, as if you are dying then after, trying to re-live again.

but moving on isnt at all about being in pain, like you are being doomed, like you are having near-to-death-experience.

you may lose a big part of you. but you never lose all yourself at all.

getting over and moving on is like regaining your lost strength, saving once again energy, love and happiness. and more so, preparing more yourself for a bigger battle of love that you are yet to encounter.

pain. sadness. depression. fear. feeling of loss and unbelongingness.

we always think of how doomed we are. but the truth is, we dont really. it's only our own minds telling us of our own weakness, of our own fear. it is only our hypothalamus making us think that it's like the end of the world.

BUT iT'S NOT REALLY.

our minds are just so imaginative that we think the opposite of what we would really want to do.

it's DENiAL. and denial is always a part of moving on as it is our coping mechanism.

anger. hatred. fury. fierce.

oftentimes, we find it hard to move on that sometimes we come to the point where we hate others and we hate ourselves.

but that's just how we cope with our pain.

and i tell you, no one has the right to condemn you of how you repair your heart because they don't really know how much you are hurting.

but still, by the end of all these, we just laugh and laugh of how stupid we once had been -- crying for someone who doesnt really deserve even a single tear. we keep on poking our heads for being such big idiots.

and above all these, we just find ourselves seeking for more -- more of a love far different from the one we once had; looking for more of someone whom we are ready to give all our stored energy and love. and by this time, all we want to do is to love more and more, not thinking anymore of what might be the end of all these.

see? moving on is just like that, saving energy, love and happiness for a more worth-it love we are about to invest into.

so, don't give me that sad face. go to the world and show that you are a strong sperm your dad has given to your mom.

MOVE ON. MOVE FORWARD. a more worth loving person is waiting for you just right at the end of this tunnel. would you want to show him/her that ugly look? naah! you might just miss him/her. so MAKE YOURSELF LOOK BEAUTiFUL.

cummon, get up! don't make his/her waiting too long. he/she might get bored.

stand up. and go! <*i just push you on your back*>