this year 2009, lots of things have happened. there are so many experiences that i have gone through and there are also lots of new faces whom i get to know.
so, before 2009 ends, let me share to you these wonderful people whom i cherished so much -- the people who have been a big part of my life and that on this day onwards, i will never ever forget them no matter what.
Mrs. Milagros Abapo - my all time loving, ever-supportive and best Mama in the world. you have always been there for me ever since i was born (of course). and even though i have been such a very naughty girl as i grow up, still, you never stop loving me. you even supported me in every endeavor that i take. i know that on the coming years of my life, i know i can always count on you.
Mr. Marino Abapo - the best papa in the world. for all the sacrifices you've done for us, thank you so much. i always know that whatever life i lead, i know that you are also there to support me all the way.
Quaineleen Abapo - although this year has not been a good year for us, still, i love you. you're the only sister that i have and i hope that on the coming years, you and i will always be there for each other.
Ronie Boy Abapo, Delmar Abapo, Marlon Abapo - the ever-supportive brothers of my life. i know that you dont like me that much. but still, you are there for me through ups and downs and you never stop loving me despite everything.
Dahly Vie Padillo - beshiey! this is quite a good year for us. we may not talk that much, we may not see frequently, we may not hang out always, but still, you will be in my heart no matter what. for all the times we've shared together. for all the laughing and crying moments of our lives. thank you so much for always remembering me and for simply being my ever-loving beshiey. like what you've said on your post, longest bestfriend ever. no one can replace you in my heart. sisters forever.
Avon Mae Sedantes - it's almost a year that we have been so close. thank you so much for the trust you gave to me. thank you also for supporting me on my BiGA MOMENTS with Ed (aiiish. those days are long gone. LOL). more so, a BiG thanks for just being you. i'm grateful enough that i have you as a friend and a sister, by heart. next to dahly, you are my bff.
Hannah Janine Daday - this is not so good year for us. we've gone through series of conflicts. but even so, we have proven that good friends remain. you're a very good friend -- AND EVERYONE MUST KNOW iT! -- i thank you for simply being you and being a part of me.
MLS Family - another year has been added on our friendship and on our kinship. we're not really related by blood. but since we belong on the same elite family, i consider you all my brothers and sisters. thank you for constantly showing to me the warmth of the LOVE shared by the MLS family.
Ronald Jay Pondavilla - i was once so hooked over you last summer -- but of course, that was OVER. thank you for being a part of my small world.
Krystalaine Leguip - i wont ever forget when you told me you liked the way i handle myself. you are the very first person to tell me that i handle myself and i live my life well. there are only few people who come to appreciate me as what i am. so, BiG THANKS tal for what you have said. it boosted my confidence more.
Richard Catulong - chardiie! ooh. i miss calling you that name. i know we can no longer bring back the same old friendship that we had before. we may be able to revive the friendship, but the closeness is no longer the same. i cannot blame you for that. but despite everything, i still consider you as one of the greatest friends that i have. i hope that wherever you are now, you are happy with your life. i miss you CHARDiiE!
Stephanie Anne Soriano - porn goddess! LOL. i am so grateful that even though our worlds are totally apart, we still become good friends -- we are even close now. i will always remember that laughing moment we had (with eunice) back during the signing of clearance for first semester a.y. 2009-2010. i will always treasure that moment. PG!
Rigil Kent Joseph Batistil and Rvin John Servillon -- another year has been added to our friendship. it's six years now that we have known one another. we may no longer have the same bonding like what we had during our first year, still both of you will always be in my heart.
Ed Christian Yarananon - you made me stronger by breaking my heart. LOL. just kidding. seriously, i am very thankful that even for a short time, i had a good time spent with you. no matter what happens, you will always be my BESSY -- the same kid who came to me almost 4 years ago because he was deeply heart broken. i know we can no longer have the same closeness as before. i know too there is so much that awaits us in the future. i HAVE LOVED you. and i thank you for letting me feel this way. i experienced how it is to take risks -- risks in loving. i may have failed -- for you -- but for me, i am always triumphant because i have loved -- and that's what matters most. but for now, everything must come to an end -- and that end is NOW.
lastly,
MiRALYN MADEL iNSO ABAPO - for being such a fighter this year. you may have been gaga, stupid, crazy, idiotic, noisy and irresponsible, but still, i love you with all my heart. you have once proven to the world that you are not just a NOBODY. for this coming year, i hope to see you smiling, so sweetly and being successful in every endeavor that you will take. BE NOT AFRAiD. you may be small. just look up at the sky and you will see that we are all under the same sky, thus, no one has the right to step on you. always and forever be a FiGHTER -- of love, of friendship, of justice, of peace (<- this is a bit questionable) and for every person's right to dream, to live, to laugh and to love. Fightooooo MADHEL! the world is waiting for you! :D
credits to DAHLY ViE PADiLLO. as i was reading her bloggie, she gave me the idea to remember the people who are important to me. THANK YOU LHiNG.
Tuesday, December 29, 2009
PiCTURES -- a newer ME. <3
this is a post-christmas addiction of my face. LOL.
but it really is the NEWER ME. the I of 2010. this is just a sample
this is ME. there's a NEW YEAR that waits for me. nothing is left for me here. i know, i should no longer wait. my waiting is over now.
i dont want to regret anything so starting this time onwards, there will be a new and better me that i can always be proud of. :D
but it really is the NEWER ME. the I of 2010. this is just a sample
this is ME. there's a NEW YEAR that waits for me. nothing is left for me here. i know, i should no longer wait. my waiting is over now.
i dont want to regret anything so starting this time onwards, there will be a new and better me that i can always be proud of. :D
PiCTURES -- momentous captures XD
SAMAL TRiP will be followed. pictures are still with hannah.
DEPRESSiON THERAPY: MATi TRiP
the scenery:
-->on our way
-->city streets
-->my nieces and nephews
Ezekiah: 7 months old
Andrew: 3 years old
Aaliyah: 6 years old and Erich: 5 years old
(from left to right) Erich, (up) Andrew, (down) Aaliyah and Nicole.
(from left to right) Erich, Nicole and Aaliyah
(from left to right) Erich, I and Aaliyah
-->all about me
FUNNY FACES OF CHiLDREN: CHRiSTMAS EXPERiENCE
-->apple eating contest
-->drop that coin
the scenery:
-->on our way
-->city streets
-->my nieces and nephews
Ezekiah: 7 months old
Andrew: 3 years old
Aaliyah: 6 years old and Erich: 5 years old
(from left to right) Erich, (up) Andrew, (down) Aaliyah and Nicole.
(from left to right) Erich, Nicole and Aaliyah
(from left to right) Erich, I and Aaliyah
-->all about me
-->apple eating contest
-->drop that coin
UPDATES. UPDATES -- good for 3 weeks XD
oow eem gee! it's been soow long since i last posted here. sooow sorry! APOLOGiES, please do accept. :D
during school days, i had been so busy. and when vacation came, no time to go online. i mean, don't have the money to buy time to go online! HAHAHA.
i'm so BROKE! sooow BROKE. if you only know how long i waited to go online. i even have to lie to my mom just to be allowed to go out. *cries*
anyweii, i do have lots of stories to tell about ME these past few weeks.
so, sit back, relax and enjoy reading!
December 9, 2009 :
so funny of her (PMT). ROFL. (just an update, again)
want to know what has happened to OUR friendship with PRinCESS and the others?
puros plastikan!
well, fortunate of her to win him back. how lucky of her to have dear mario again.
but, who cares? maybe avon? i think so. but anyway, does it really matter if she got mario once again? i mean, avon is into moving on. LET GO OF THE BOY BUT NOT OF THE LOVE. so, does it mean, princess is thinking avon is into competing against her for mario?
LOL. how funny of her. i cant imagine her thinking that way, as if avon is still into HiM! my god! that is so insane!
no one is competing with her. no one is declaring war against her. it's just her who declares war on her own. against whom? i dont know. avon doesnt know. hannah doesnt know. and duh! as if we care. lol.
but the point here is, she is no longer thinking of the friendship we once had. bitches, back-off. are those the exact words she used? mga langaw. oyy merry cris heruela, kami ba yan?. my god. i cant imagine madami na masyado ang nakikisawsaw at online pa nga talaga ang postings. oh ano, bulgaran nalang? ibubulgar ko nalang tong bloggie ko para may panama din kami sa kanila?.
walang 'yang mga babae din yun aa. nananahimik kami tapos may langaw at bitches pa silang nalalaman. as if naman nanakawin si mario. SOLOHiN niyang mag-isa yun!
well, so sad to know everything has come this far, nang dahil lang kay mario. hahai. buhay. SHE WON; doesnt she realize it yet? or, does she just want trouble to become controversial?
you think the friendship is still worth saving after everything? i cant imagine - for all the moments shared together, for all the secrets and advices - she'd be willing to let go of those just to have mario with her and to kick all the bitches that might want to steal her DEAR BOYFRIEND.
"halerr pen. iyong-iyo na po si mario. sayong sayo na siya. walang mang-aagaw niyan. pero sana naman, dont think only of yourself and your own scheme. avon doesnt really care about it. nor do i. think of the friendship. of the love. at least, with that, there'll be a chance that the friendship will be restored. arent you happy anymore that you already have mario with you? arent you happy that he's all yours? no one is competing with you. it's you who's competing against your own self.
and hell! tell YOUR other friends they dare not add damage to what has been ruined already. we dont want trouble. nananahimik po kami. Sana naman manahimik din yang mga bunganga niyo.”
i don’t know what will happen next to us, to our friendship, to princess and mario and to avon. but, whatever might be the result, just go with the flow. if they let go of the friendship, FiNE with us. no one would actually want to be friends with *******s. oops. apologies. LOL.
BiTCHES? we know it already. at least we don’t betray our friends. LOL. if we are bitches, what do you call yourself? LEECHES then? LOL. oops. apologies again.
sorry for the use of words. i just got pissed off with what i’m hearing. don’t mess with us though, because if you do, we won’t definitely BACK OFF.
*peace out*
December 10, 2009
HOPE THiNGS WORK OUT RiGHT. :D
Today is bembie’s 18th birthday. of course, i was invited. however, i dont have the courage to face the others given the situation as tight as what is happening now. honestly, i cant afford to be so plastic in front of them. well, i couldnt blame them. nor can they blame me. in the first place, it was them who set the gap. if they just didnt rightfully mess with us, then, maybe, nothing like this would be happening.
anyweii, well, last night i asked my mother's permission if i could go tonight. well, of course, i already knew what would be her answer - if course it's a NO. neither do i want to go. well, i just want to hear mama not allowing me so that i can have so valid reason not to go to her birthday. of course, part of me is saying i should have come because during my birthday, bembie was also there, and the others. but, no one can blame me for not wanting to come. i cant afford to having smiles for them when the truth is i dont really want to. i want to set things right before the old relationship would be restored. of course i want to be friends with them all. but i dont know if there is chance, once again. after all that's happening. after all the bitch talks.
i only hope one thing, to make things work out right. of course i miss everybody else's company. who wouldnt, right?
DEPRESSiON THERAPY: MATi TRiP
and since i am into moving on ALSO, i want for myself to have just a little trip. well, actually, December 12, 2009 would be my cousin's wedding. Papa was coming, and so was my brother. so i decided for myself to join their trip! maybe, i'll find someone who would SOMEHOW replace my thoughts about ED.
so, at that time, i was all alone in going to TAGUM. it was my first time to travel all by myself. and to think it was NiGHT. :) i was thinking that if i am to ride a bus, of course i would get a seat then and there. but guess what? as i climb up the bus, oooppss. it's already full and i have to do STANDiNG OBATiON! yes! it's tru! lol. good thing there was this young gentleman who shared his seat with me. and though i was having difficult time making myself stable, still it's good than not having seated at all, right?
of course the trip was so fun and enjoyable and kinda HOT, literally. i mean, well, i was riding NON-AiR bus, so it should be warm. but i never thought it was warmer than what i expected.
my brother was always texting me where i was and all that. and ooh! back in CARMEN, DAVAO DEL NORTE, ooh.. their christmas lights were soooow GREAT! as iin! if you only have seen it! :D
so, then, i reached tagum and from tagum we rode bus via MATi. i enjoyed the trip, of course! and though it was a loooong trip, still i LURV it! :D
so, upon reaching there, we ate dinner and went to sleep.
the next day, DECEMBER 12, 2009, it was my cousin's wedding.
so, the people were having themselves fixed at BAYWALK HOTEL. i was there also. (ooh. by the way, i was not one of the entourage. i was just a plain expectator). so, back to our topic. i was also at baywalk, waiting for everybody to get dressed before going to the church (which was just a few meters away from the hotel). and since i was soooow bored, i took a slight snooze. i was not able to mind the time. and guess what happened to me next?
well, nagising lang naman ako nang ako ay tinawag ng isa ko pang pinsan. yes, what you are thinking is right! i slept, maybe for almost an hour, i dont know. and i was all ALONE, in the LOBBY. yes, you are right again, i slept at the sofa by the lobby! LOL.
you cant blame me. i was so tired. i was so bored. who would not fall asleep with that?
but anyway, it was really soooow FUNNY! i really wont forget that moment! HAHA.
so, ayun, nagkasayahan. kainan and everything. by the end of the day, we could not go home, of course, it's already night. if we decided to go home, maybe we will reach davao by midnight. thus, we stayed for another night at MATi.
i spent my night taking pictures with my cute nieces and nephew.
the next morning, DECEMBER 13, 2009, i was so bored again and so i decided to take a little walk around the area. well, mati was just like a small municipality. i was thinking i would not be able to live such mountainous area. but though it was just plain and simple, still, i love the place because it's somehow quiet, unlike davao.
so, there, i was walking. i was wearing mini dress (which i wore the day before because i ran out of dress since i only brought clothes good for an overnight stay). i was not thinking of what people will say or what. DUH! i'm from the city, who cares with those from the rural area? LOL.
anyway, i went to a newly opened shopping center which sold very, very CHEAP yet NiCE items! if i only brought money with me, i would be able to buy something. and ooh! i saw some shoes.
on my way back, nabastos pa ako nung isang tao na ewan. napatawid ako bigla. natakot eh. ROFL.
well, it's good that i was there -- at mati. i was able to forget my depression in davao city, somehow. and i enjoyed playing with my nieces and nephew. i was also able to enjoy the tranquility of the area.
but what i hated the most was the part when we reach davao. everything went back to normal. i felt again the same depression i felt before i left davao. thoughts about him came back.
haitx. i wonder, when will i be able to get over HiM?
STiLL HAVE TO SPEND ONE LAST BORiNG WEEK AT SCHOOL
exams were over last week, but we still have toenjoy another boring week at school. classes were supposed to end by 18. niahaha. what a torture.
anyway, i enjoyed the week because i was busy for the PiNASKUHAN 2009 by the SSG. there was contest, and i was one of the facilitators for our program's representative. Rigil, Siv and I were kinda werla due to the things that should be done. but still, in the end, we were able to surpass such challenge! and good to hear that the MLS program won the third place for the christmas showtime.
well, it's our little brothers and sisters work of talent! yes, the first years were the ones who represented our program, together with Ms. Margaret, Ms. Caren, and Ms. Cynthia. nice to see everyone singing and dancing on stage. :D
and one thing that i could not forget that time, kuya neil made me sing and dance in front of everybody! well, it was like ABS-CBN's showtime where the madlang people would sing, dance, or both or whatever the score they give for the performers.
i was embarrassed, of course. but, what else can i do? ika nga ni Rigil, "Madel, karon pa ka maulaw?". well, he's right. no room for chickens. LOL.
by the end, our program won the third place. and i felt satisfied with that because it's our first time to bring a victory for the program where i worked for it. :D
December 18, 2009:
SAMAL TRiP WiTH GUMMY BEARS
DEPRESSiON MUST COME TO AN END. NOW.
it has been a long semester for us three (avon, hannah and i). we've experienced a lot of things that we can never forget all our life. we've gone through happiness, sadness, love and even pain of loving. but, since it's christmas season, our hearts should be free from all heartaches we feel. and so we had CHRiSTMAS OUTiNG!
all three of us, and henry van tado went to EL MAGiC, iGACOS to shout our hearts out and release our depression.
hannah and henry had their heart-to-heart talk. avon and i went our way to shouting. HAHA. yes, it was 4 in the morning. i was on my bikini and we were shouting out loud to release all opur hard feelings. it felt good. of course. having shouted that loud. HAHA.
when we went back to davao, it's time to face reality. all of us four decided that whatever happened back in EL MAGiC, it must be left there -- there and there alone. and yes, i ended everything -- my love for HiM, our conflict with Princess and the group and everything else!
iT'S A NEW START FOR OURSELVES AND FOR OUR HEARTS.
December 17, 19, 21-24, 2009
MiSA DE GALLO
i wanted to complete the 9 mornings of Misa de Gallo. but since i had three absences, i did not make it. and though it's like that, i still had good time of going to church that early. :D
honestly, i was hoping that even for one day, i would be able to see him. too bad i did not...
..until December 24, 2009 came.
its true that when we were at the church, i always looked for him, wondering where he was seated. on the day before christmas, i still looked for him. but one moment came when i just looked around, for nothing, really. that time, the sun had already shone up. as i wandered my head around. ooopps! who's that person i saw? niahaha.
of course it was ED. but i have to pretend i did not see him, although i really wanted to see him that moment. haha. anyway, i saw him and i pretended he did not exist! haha:D
well, i have to do it. i have to. i'm into moving on, right?
when i got home, i saw my cellphone, may nag-missed call. and guess who? niahaha. yes, it was him. i wanted to ask him why he did so. i had second thoughts so i was not able to ask him right away. i was soow curious. of course, i wanted to know if he missed me. blah. blah. he said it was just nothing. he even asked me for a load. i gave him 5, although i dont have load for my own. niahaha. that's what you call STOOPiiDiTY. HAHAHA :D here's the conversation (although it was not with the same exact words).
ED: salamat sa load dhel. so, musta?
ME: oyy ed, next time napud ta text-text. dili man gud ku unli.
ED: ay oy. paload ug oltext. nakita baya tika ganiha ha
ME: dili ku gusto oltext kay unli aku. HAHA :) yea. i know nakita ko nimo ganiha.
ED: pamati
ME: suya ka? tagam. HAHA
ED: owkii. last text na naku ni sa imo. bye
ME: kaw bahala. :)
-- THE END --
HAHA. watta funny conversation, although it was not really funny.
haii.
CHRiSTMAS EXPERiENCE
later this evening, we had christmas party for my nieces and nephews. and it was soow fun seeing them enjoying the night. HAHA. we played and ate and danced and played again.
i had fun too, playing with them, seeing them play and dance and eat! HAHA XD.
christmas really is for everyone -- old or young; no age; no looks; no gaps.
later, we attended the mass. the priest spent 30 minuts for his homily. GAWD! can you imagine it? of course i was bored. and i was not listening anymore, while looking for ED. haha. *stoopiidity strikes*
but still, in the end, i did not see him. maybe it's God telling me to completely let go.
when we reached home, we ate together. i went to my nanay judith's house. spent couple of minutes there then went home and slept. HAHA.
i just slept. i was tired, soow tired to think of anything. :D
December 29, 2009
the MOST RECENT thing
here i am now, at my brother's house. after almost two weeks of being imprisoned in our house, i finally got out! haha :D
pictures for this post will appear on the next post
*peace out*
during school days, i had been so busy. and when vacation came, no time to go online. i mean, don't have the money to buy time to go online! HAHAHA.
i'm so BROKE! sooow BROKE. if you only know how long i waited to go online. i even have to lie to my mom just to be allowed to go out. *cries*
anyweii, i do have lots of stories to tell about ME these past few weeks.
so, sit back, relax and enjoy reading!
December 9, 2009 :
want to know what has happened to OUR friendship with PRinCESS and the others?
puros plastikan!
well, fortunate of her to win him back. how lucky of her to have dear mario again.
but, who cares? maybe avon? i think so. but anyway, does it really matter if she got mario once again? i mean, avon is into moving on. LET GO OF THE BOY BUT NOT OF THE LOVE. so, does it mean, princess is thinking avon is into competing against her for mario?
LOL. how funny of her. i cant imagine her thinking that way, as if avon is still into HiM! my god! that is so insane!
no one is competing with her. no one is declaring war against her. it's just her who declares war on her own. against whom? i dont know. avon doesnt know. hannah doesnt know. and duh! as if we care. lol.
but the point here is, she is no longer thinking of the friendship we once had. bitches, back-off. are those the exact words she used? mga langaw. oyy merry cris heruela, kami ba yan?. my god. i cant imagine madami na masyado ang nakikisawsaw at online pa nga talaga ang postings. oh ano, bulgaran nalang? ibubulgar ko nalang tong bloggie ko para may panama din kami sa kanila?.
walang 'yang mga babae din yun aa. nananahimik kami tapos may langaw at bitches pa silang nalalaman. as if naman nanakawin si mario. SOLOHiN niyang mag-isa yun!
well, so sad to know everything has come this far, nang dahil lang kay mario. hahai. buhay. SHE WON; doesnt she realize it yet? or, does she just want trouble to become controversial?
you think the friendship is still worth saving after everything? i cant imagine - for all the moments shared together, for all the secrets and advices - she'd be willing to let go of those just to have mario with her and to kick all the bitches that might want to steal her DEAR BOYFRIEND.
"halerr pen. iyong-iyo na po si mario. sayong sayo na siya. walang mang-aagaw niyan. pero sana naman, dont think only of yourself and your own scheme. avon doesnt really care about it. nor do i. think of the friendship. of the love. at least, with that, there'll be a chance that the friendship will be restored. arent you happy anymore that you already have mario with you? arent you happy that he's all yours? no one is competing with you. it's you who's competing against your own self.
and hell! tell YOUR other friends they dare not add damage to what has been ruined already. we dont want trouble. nananahimik po kami. Sana naman manahimik din yang mga bunganga niyo.”
i don’t know what will happen next to us, to our friendship, to princess and mario and to avon. but, whatever might be the result, just go with the flow. if they let go of the friendship, FiNE with us. no one would actually want to be friends with *******s. oops. apologies. LOL.
BiTCHES? we know it already. at least we don’t betray our friends. LOL. if we are bitches, what do you call yourself? LEECHES then? LOL. oops. apologies again.
sorry for the use of words. i just got pissed off with what i’m hearing. don’t mess with us though, because if you do, we won’t definitely BACK OFF.
December 10, 2009
Today is bembie’s 18th birthday. of course, i was invited. however, i dont have the courage to face the others given the situation as tight as what is happening now. honestly, i cant afford to be so plastic in front of them. well, i couldnt blame them. nor can they blame me. in the first place, it was them who set the gap. if they just didnt rightfully mess with us, then, maybe, nothing like this would be happening.
anyweii, well, last night i asked my mother's permission if i could go tonight. well, of course, i already knew what would be her answer - if course it's a NO. neither do i want to go. well, i just want to hear mama not allowing me so that i can have so valid reason not to go to her birthday. of course, part of me is saying i should have come because during my birthday, bembie was also there, and the others. but, no one can blame me for not wanting to come. i cant afford to having smiles for them when the truth is i dont really want to. i want to set things right before the old relationship would be restored. of course i want to be friends with them all. but i dont know if there is chance, once again. after all that's happening. after all the bitch talks.
i only hope one thing, to make things work out right. of course i miss everybody else's company. who wouldnt, right?
and since i am into moving on ALSO, i want for myself to have just a little trip. well, actually, December 12, 2009 would be my cousin's wedding. Papa was coming, and so was my brother. so i decided for myself to join their trip! maybe, i'll find someone who would SOMEHOW replace my thoughts about ED.
so, at that time, i was all alone in going to TAGUM. it was my first time to travel all by myself. and to think it was NiGHT. :) i was thinking that if i am to ride a bus, of course i would get a seat then and there. but guess what? as i climb up the bus, oooppss. it's already full and i have to do STANDiNG OBATiON! yes! it's tru! lol. good thing there was this young gentleman who shared his seat with me. and though i was having difficult time making myself stable, still it's good than not having seated at all, right?
of course the trip was so fun and enjoyable and kinda HOT, literally. i mean, well, i was riding NON-AiR bus, so it should be warm. but i never thought it was warmer than what i expected.
my brother was always texting me where i was and all that. and ooh! back in CARMEN, DAVAO DEL NORTE, ooh.. their christmas lights were soooow GREAT! as iin! if you only have seen it! :D
so, then, i reached tagum and from tagum we rode bus via MATi. i enjoyed the trip, of course! and though it was a loooong trip, still i LURV it! :D
so, upon reaching there, we ate dinner and went to sleep.
the next day, DECEMBER 12, 2009, it was my cousin's wedding.
so, the people were having themselves fixed at BAYWALK HOTEL. i was there also. (ooh. by the way, i was not one of the entourage. i was just a plain expectator). so, back to our topic. i was also at baywalk, waiting for everybody to get dressed before going to the church (which was just a few meters away from the hotel). and since i was soooow bored, i took a slight snooze. i was not able to mind the time. and guess what happened to me next?
well, nagising lang naman ako nang ako ay tinawag ng isa ko pang pinsan. yes, what you are thinking is right! i slept, maybe for almost an hour, i dont know. and i was all ALONE, in the LOBBY. yes, you are right again, i slept at the sofa by the lobby! LOL.
you cant blame me. i was so tired. i was so bored. who would not fall asleep with that?
but anyway, it was really soooow FUNNY! i really wont forget that moment! HAHA.
so, ayun, nagkasayahan. kainan and everything. by the end of the day, we could not go home, of course, it's already night. if we decided to go home, maybe we will reach davao by midnight. thus, we stayed for another night at MATi.
i spent my night taking pictures with my cute nieces and nephew.
the next morning, DECEMBER 13, 2009, i was so bored again and so i decided to take a little walk around the area. well, mati was just like a small municipality. i was thinking i would not be able to live such mountainous area. but though it was just plain and simple, still, i love the place because it's somehow quiet, unlike davao.
so, there, i was walking. i was wearing mini dress (which i wore the day before because i ran out of dress since i only brought clothes good for an overnight stay). i was not thinking of what people will say or what. DUH! i'm from the city, who cares with those from the rural area? LOL.
anyway, i went to a newly opened shopping center which sold very, very CHEAP yet NiCE items! if i only brought money with me, i would be able to buy something. and ooh! i saw some shoes.
on my way back, nabastos pa ako nung isang tao na ewan. napatawid ako bigla. natakot eh. ROFL.
well, it's good that i was there -- at mati. i was able to forget my depression in davao city, somehow. and i enjoyed playing with my nieces and nephew. i was also able to enjoy the tranquility of the area.
but what i hated the most was the part when we reach davao. everything went back to normal. i felt again the same depression i felt before i left davao. thoughts about him came back.
haitx. i wonder, when will i be able to get over HiM?
exams were over last week, but we still have to
anyway, i enjoyed the week because i was busy for the PiNASKUHAN 2009 by the SSG. there was contest, and i was one of the facilitators for our program's representative. Rigil, Siv and I were kinda werla due to the things that should be done. but still, in the end, we were able to surpass such challenge! and good to hear that the MLS program won the third place for the christmas showtime.
well, it's our little brothers and sisters work of talent! yes, the first years were the ones who represented our program, together with Ms. Margaret, Ms. Caren, and Ms. Cynthia. nice to see everyone singing and dancing on stage. :D
and one thing that i could not forget that time, kuya neil made me sing and dance in front of everybody! well, it was like ABS-CBN's showtime where the madlang people would sing, dance, or both or whatever the score they give for the performers.
i was embarrassed, of course. but, what else can i do? ika nga ni Rigil, "Madel, karon pa ka maulaw?". well, he's right. no room for chickens. LOL.
by the end, our program won the third place. and i felt satisfied with that because it's our first time to bring a victory for the program where i worked for it. :D
December 18, 2009:
DEPRESSiON MUST COME TO AN END. NOW.
it has been a long semester for us three (avon, hannah and i). we've experienced a lot of things that we can never forget all our life. we've gone through happiness, sadness, love and even pain of loving. but, since it's christmas season, our hearts should be free from all heartaches we feel. and so we had CHRiSTMAS OUTiNG!
all three of us, and henry van tado went to EL MAGiC, iGACOS to shout our hearts out and release our depression.
hannah and henry had their heart-to-heart talk. avon and i went our way to shouting. HAHA. yes, it was 4 in the morning. i was on my bikini and we were shouting out loud to release all opur hard feelings. it felt good. of course. having shouted that loud. HAHA.
when we went back to davao, it's time to face reality. all of us four decided that whatever happened back in EL MAGiC, it must be left there -- there and there alone. and yes, i ended everything -- my love for HiM, our conflict with Princess and the group and everything else!
iT'S A NEW START FOR OURSELVES AND FOR OUR HEARTS.
December 17, 19, 21-24, 2009
i wanted to complete the 9 mornings of Misa de Gallo. but since i had three absences, i did not make it. and though it's like that, i still had good time of going to church that early. :D
honestly, i was hoping that even for one day, i would be able to see him. too bad i did not...
..until December 24, 2009 came.
its true that when we were at the church, i always looked for him, wondering where he was seated. on the day before christmas, i still looked for him. but one moment came when i just looked around, for nothing, really. that time, the sun had already shone up. as i wandered my head around. ooopps! who's that person i saw? niahaha.
of course it was ED. but i have to pretend i did not see him, although i really wanted to see him that moment. haha. anyway, i saw him and i pretended he did not exist! haha:D
well, i have to do it. i have to. i'm into moving on, right?
when i got home, i saw my cellphone, may nag-missed call. and guess who? niahaha. yes, it was him. i wanted to ask him why he did so. i had second thoughts so i was not able to ask him right away. i was soow curious. of course, i wanted to know if he missed me. blah. blah. he said it was just nothing. he even asked me for a load. i gave him 5, although i dont have load for my own. niahaha. that's what you call STOOPiiDiTY. HAHAHA :D here's the conversation (although it was not with the same exact words).
ED: salamat sa load dhel. so, musta?
ME: oyy ed, next time napud ta text-text. dili man gud ku unli.
ED: ay oy. paload ug oltext. nakita baya tika ganiha ha
ME: dili ku gusto oltext kay unli aku. HAHA :) yea. i know nakita ko nimo ganiha.
ED: pamati
ME: suya ka? tagam. HAHA
ED: owkii. last text na naku ni sa imo. bye
ME: kaw bahala. :)
-- THE END --
HAHA. watta funny conversation, although it was not really funny.
haii.
later this evening, we had christmas party for my nieces and nephews. and it was soow fun seeing them enjoying the night. HAHA. we played and ate and danced and played again.
i had fun too, playing with them, seeing them play and dance and eat! HAHA XD.
christmas really is for everyone -- old or young; no age; no looks; no gaps.
later, we attended the mass. the priest spent 30 minuts for his homily. GAWD! can you imagine it? of course i was bored. and i was not listening anymore, while looking for ED. haha. *stoopiidity strikes*
but still, in the end, i did not see him. maybe it's God telling me to completely let go.
when we reached home, we ate together. i went to my nanay judith's house. spent couple of minutes there then went home and slept. HAHA.
i just slept. i was tired, soow tired to think of anything. :D
December 29, 2009
here i am now, at my brother's house. after almost two weeks of being imprisoned in our house, i finally got out! haha :D
pictures for this post will appear on the next post
*peace out*
Monday, December 07, 2009
conflicts must be ended. friendship must be restored.
seeing how things have gone far this time, i guess it's better that the people involve should sit down and talk.
i think it's better that the conflict should be ended. there are so many things that are affected, including the friendship. there's a risk that one day, our friendship will be ruined just because of one loser.
in my opinion, friendship counts more than any guy in this world. yes. but of course, it cannot be avoided that the two parties will get really affected seeing how attached they are with their feelings for the guy.
but, there's also a need for them to realize that by the very end of the day, all they have is each other and not the guy they want the most.
they (including I) have been too consumed of the whole situation. so attached of the emotion, indeed.
well, all i can say is, the best gift we can give ourselves this Christmas is FRiENDSHiP.
i always hope to see everyone happily smiling this christmas day. :D
i think it's better that the conflict should be ended. there are so many things that are affected, including the friendship. there's a risk that one day, our friendship will be ruined just because of one loser.
in my opinion, friendship counts more than any guy in this world. yes. but of course, it cannot be avoided that the two parties will get really affected seeing how attached they are with their feelings for the guy.
but, there's also a need for them to realize that by the very end of the day, all they have is each other and not the guy they want the most.
they (including I) have been too consumed of the whole situation. so attached of the emotion, indeed.
well, all i can say is, the best gift we can give ourselves this Christmas is FRiENDSHiP.
i always hope to see everyone happily smiling this christmas day. :D
tired. confused. sad. depressed. anxious. cramming.
tomorrow is exam day. yes. and look what i am doing. not studying. browsing the net. chatting with friends. talking with other people's affair. eating and eating and eating.
i dont know what should be done. i lost my focus already. my mind is so preoccupied.
ED. ED. ED. ED.
haitx. here i go again. thinking bout him again. over and over again.
how pathetic. LOL.
haitx. enlightenment please. i need some enlightenment.
ugh.
*peace out*
i dont know what should be done. i lost my focus already. my mind is so preoccupied.
ED. ED. ED. ED.
haitx. here i go again. thinking bout him again. over and over again.
how pathetic. LOL.
haitx. enlightenment please. i need some enlightenment.
ugh.
i'm still so sleepy. *yawns*
time check: it's 5:34 am in my lappy. but i guess it's earlier.
gawd! i barely slept! i only had 3 hours, or less for my sleep! and imagine, i still have to attend the procession for today is the feast of our lady of the immaculate conception. and i still have exams tomorrow so i need to study for today.
waa. i cant believe myself all stuck with my lappy for the whole night!
here i go again, losing focus. instead of thinking bout the exams, here i am, getting hooked with the internet. LOL.
i'm still so sleepy as of this moment. sh*t! i dont want to attend the procession. if not for that f**king attendace slip to be required during signing of clearance, i wont rally come. haitx.
i dont know if my eyes can still endure a whole day of activity. plus study. haitx.
i want to sleep. i'm so sleepy. gawd help!
gawd! i barely slept! i only had 3 hours, or less for my sleep! and imagine, i still have to attend the procession for today is the feast of our lady of the immaculate conception. and i still have exams tomorrow so i need to study for today.
waa. i cant believe myself all stuck with my lappy for the whole night!
here i go again, losing focus. instead of thinking bout the exams, here i am, getting hooked with the internet. LOL.
i'm still so sleepy as of this moment. sh*t! i dont want to attend the procession. if not for that f**king attendace slip to be required during signing of clearance, i wont rally come. haitx.
i dont know if my eyes can still endure a whole day of activity. plus study. haitx.
i want to sleep. i'm so sleepy. gawd help!
after all, it's still HiM by the end of the day <3
here i go again, coming back to where i once was.
all too suddenly, i love him again. so drastic. so dramatic.
so suddenly my heart changes its course. it once took the path away from him. now, it's back on its usual track.
i dont understand how i still have this feeling. i mean, i have already decided that i should move on, move forward. but, i guess, i just cant. i guess, my heart hasnt stopped loving him, after all.
i guess, this is my fate. this is where my heart wants to stay. pathetic to hear that i'm into someone who doesnt even care.
who cares too? i dont care. avon doesnt care. no one cares.
for all i know, it will be my heart's happiness if it loves ed. LOL. sounds funny and corny, but it's the truth.
here i am once again, back to my old track, back to the path of loving him. after all, it's still HiM by the end of the day <3.
all too suddenly, i love him again. so drastic. so dramatic.
so suddenly my heart changes its course. it once took the path away from him. now, it's back on its usual track.
i dont understand how i still have this feeling. i mean, i have already decided that i should move on, move forward. but, i guess, i just cant. i guess, my heart hasnt stopped loving him, after all.
i guess, this is my fate. this is where my heart wants to stay. pathetic to hear that i'm into someone who doesnt even care.
who cares too? i dont care. avon doesnt care. no one cares.
for all i know, it will be my heart's happiness if it loves ed. LOL. sounds funny and corny, but it's the truth.
here i am once again, back to my old track, back to the path of loving him. after all, it's still HiM by the end of the day <3.
just an update. :D
i dont know how to react with how things work these days.
gawd! what's with my classmates? i cant seem to understand them all. are they all against AVON MAE SEDANTES?
for this whole day, avon kept telling me how our friends (that is if they are still our friends), stared at her every time she'll go near mario or her name will be linked to him, or if we just simply laugh (and we're referring mario with our smirks).
gawd. what's with them? i dont get them at all. why would they do such? what were the stares for? help them LORD. enlighten them all. LOL.
anyway, i dont know if the old friendship can still be revived. lots of things have happened already. lots of betraying acts have been done.
i dont know if avon can still trust them. maybe, she can no longer trust them. halerr. matapos ba naman ang lahat?
as for me, i love all my friends. but i love avon more. so if they dare mess with her, definitely, they will mess with me too!
and ow! before i forgot. let me share this realization:
Rigil and i were together this evening, while going home. and i was asking him some questions.
as i can remember, mario and princess got together on november 22, 2009, the day after our pilgrimage. and of course, avon and i didnt know about it at that time; only a little later.
i remember also avon forcing princess to tell her if princess was already falling for him. and princess told her that she's just waiting for mario's confirmation of his feelings for avon. so, is she saying that at that time, she's still waiting for mario's confirmation? well, probably, that's the case.
but, come to think of this:
why would princess say such if she and mario got together, already? i mean, was it really necessary to hide the truth from avon? or i think the right question should be was it really her intention to hide from avon the truth for some other reasons? well, i guess the latter is the most appropriate for the whole situation.
hindi po ako nanggagatong dito. di ko po gusto gatungan pa ang conflict between avon and princess.
my point is, if she didnt have any plans of betraying avon, princess should have told avon the truth much earlier, right? well, honestly, having your friend's guy for yourself doesnt really sound good. it's definitely betrayal. but, it would be understandable if the two people involved are really in love with each other. that would be acceptable for avon's part.
but what happend was, it was all too late for avon to know that her LOVE trip with mario has already been ended, with princess' presence. and what makes the situation worse was that, no one told her, even princess about what's going on with mario and her. and take note, ilang araw na po ang nagdaan mula ng naging sina princess at mario nang sinabi ni princess na hinihintay niya lang na magka-aminan na sila ni mario.
halerr! how SANE is she? naging sila na po. ba't pa may ganung factor? ano, palabas niya lang para sabihing hindi niya talaga inagaw nang pa-sekreto si mario?
well, i think i just found an answer to my question.
but i guess, things should end here. except maybe for the instances when our friends will turn their backs against avon.
that is another case.
*peace out :)*
gawd! what's with my classmates? i cant seem to understand them all. are they all against AVON MAE SEDANTES?
for this whole day, avon kept telling me how our friends (that is if they are still our friends), stared at her every time she'll go near mario or her name will be linked to him, or if we just simply laugh (and we're referring mario with our smirks).
gawd. what's with them? i dont get them at all. why would they do such? what were the stares for? help them LORD. enlighten them all. LOL.
anyway, i dont know if the old friendship can still be revived. lots of things have happened already. lots of betraying acts have been done.
i dont know if avon can still trust them. maybe, she can no longer trust them. halerr. matapos ba naman ang lahat?
as for me, i love all my friends. but i love avon more. so if they dare mess with her, definitely, they will mess with me too!
and ow! before i forgot. let me share this realization:
Rigil and i were together this evening, while going home. and i was asking him some questions.
as i can remember, mario and princess got together on november 22, 2009, the day after our pilgrimage. and of course, avon and i didnt know about it at that time; only a little later.
i remember also avon forcing princess to tell her if princess was already falling for him. and princess told her that she's just waiting for mario's confirmation of his feelings for avon. so, is she saying that at that time, she's still waiting for mario's confirmation? well, probably, that's the case.
but, come to think of this:
why would princess say such if she and mario got together, already? i mean, was it really necessary to hide the truth from avon? or i think the right question should be was it really her intention to hide from avon the truth for some other reasons? well, i guess the latter is the most appropriate for the whole situation.
hindi po ako nanggagatong dito. di ko po gusto gatungan pa ang conflict between avon and princess.
my point is, if she didnt have any plans of betraying avon, princess should have told avon the truth much earlier, right? well, honestly, having your friend's guy for yourself doesnt really sound good. it's definitely betrayal. but, it would be understandable if the two people involved are really in love with each other. that would be acceptable for avon's part.
but what happend was, it was all too late for avon to know that her LOVE trip with mario has already been ended, with princess' presence. and what makes the situation worse was that, no one told her, even princess about what's going on with mario and her. and take note, ilang araw na po ang nagdaan mula ng naging sina princess at mario nang sinabi ni princess na hinihintay niya lang na magka-aminan na sila ni mario.
halerr! how SANE is she? naging sila na po. ba't pa may ganung factor? ano, palabas niya lang para sabihing hindi niya talaga inagaw nang pa-sekreto si mario?
well, i think i just found an answer to my question.
but i guess, things should end here. except maybe for the instances when our friends will turn their backs against avon.
that is another case.
Sunday, December 06, 2009
so, what's with them?
i really dont understand how people's minds work. it's so confusing. so drastic. so dramatic.
these past few days, it's been so heavy for both avon and me. well, actually, it's only for avon. nakikisawsaw lang po ako.
so, okei. let me get straight to my point.
i really dont understand how MARiO BAGO BREVA II and PRiNCESS MAY TEE CAJANDiG got on with their lives while there are people around them who were hurting of what they were doing.
are they that phlegmatic?
i mean, for almost two weeks, they had affair. not thinking of what might be their image inside the classroom. i mean, mario was once avon's. then suddenly, he shifted for princess. wasnt he thinking of what would be his image after doing so?
and here comes princess, avon's friend (our friend). did all she think her own bitchiness? i mean, how rightful it was to have your friend's guy for your own self? so TRAiTOR, maybe.
well, it would look nice if the two lasted long. but what happens now? they were not even able to reach two weeks! god!
what? are they just playing? do they only want games?
well, if that's the case, then WELL PLAYED, i may say.
i dont really understand how they think. i cant think of what they are up to.
what's with them?
*peace out*
oops. apologies for avon mae sedantes with the use of words here.
these past few days, it's been so heavy for both avon and me. well, actually, it's only for avon. nakikisawsaw lang po ako.
so, okei. let me get straight to my point.
i really dont understand how MARiO BAGO BREVA II and PRiNCESS MAY TEE CAJANDiG got on with their lives while there are people around them who were hurting of what they were doing.
are they that phlegmatic?
i mean, for almost two weeks, they had affair. not thinking of what might be their image inside the classroom. i mean, mario was once avon's. then suddenly, he shifted for princess. wasnt he thinking of what would be his image after doing so?
and here comes princess, avon's friend (our friend). did all she think her own bitchiness? i mean, how rightful it was to have your friend's guy for your own self? so TRAiTOR, maybe.
well, it would look nice if the two lasted long. but what happens now? they were not even able to reach two weeks! god!
what? are they just playing? do they only want games?
well, if that's the case, then WELL PLAYED, i may say.
i dont really understand how they think. i cant think of what they are up to.
what's with them?
oops. apologies for avon mae sedantes with the use of words here.
Friday, December 04, 2009
i'm supposed to escape from here...
oops. it's been almost a week since i last posted here.
pardon me please. i've been so busy lately. don't have time to go online.
as if. LOL.
honestly, i didnt feel to go online. that's why.
anyweii, let me update myself for the past days.
DECEMBER 3, 2009 - happy first monthsary to my heart. it's been a month since the very first day i felt how it is to love him. yes. you're reading it right. LOVE HiM.
i can't seem to move on. i'm supposed to be outta here. but i can't. i don't know.
i'm better off without him.
but it seems that my heart is having it's own way of ruling over destiny. i can't seem to move on.
and it seems that i still have to journey more and find out for myself where my heart will leade me.
i'm better off without him. i'm supposed to escape from here.
but i guess, i'm not. i just can't seem to move on.
pardon me please. i've been so busy lately. don't have time to go online.
as if. LOL.
honestly, i didnt feel to go online. that's why.
anyweii, let me update myself for the past days.
i can't seem to move on. i'm supposed to be outta here. but i can't. i don't know.
i'm better off without him.
but it seems that my heart is having it's own way of ruling over destiny. i can't seem to move on.
and it seems that i still have to journey more and find out for myself where my heart will leade me.
i'm better off without him. i'm supposed to escape from here.
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